What's that?

What?

That.  The necklace.

This?  Oh, it's just...something...

Yeah I know it's something, where'd it come from?

Are you OK?

What?  Yeah.  Why?

You seem off.

...she said, changing the subject...

I'm not changing the subject.  I'm just checking in.  You sounded cranky, so I'm asking.

I don't think I'm cranky I'm just asking a question?  Can't I ask a question?

Forget it.  This is called a choker.  It's not a necklace.  Well it is a necklace but technically it's called a choker.

Technically.

Yes, I'm just telling you what it is.  I thought it would go with the dress.  Now I'm not so sure.

Where'd it come from?

I've had it.

You've had it.

OK now I'm getting annoyed, you have a problem?  You want to ask me something?

No.  It's just...last night you're out with Bill...you come home late, apparently.

Apparently?  What's that?  I told you I came home at two.

Two's not late?

Two is two!  The bars close at four.  Four, five is late.  To me.

Five's the next morning.

(...)

What?  Now you have nothing to say?

OK, yes, two is late, point is I told you.  You know I came home late so I don't know why there's a mystery.

There's no mystery.

You said 'apparently'.  I told you when I got home.  I told you what I did.  

Yeah, well I don't live there right?  So I don't know.  I call.  You don't answer.  I don't know what you're doing.

Why is there a difference between what I tell you and what you know?  You DO know.  I TOLD you.

If you say so.  You go out all night with Bill...

You really want to have THAT conversation?  You want to be THAT guy?

...and now you have a CHOKER that I've never seen before...

Bill's GAY!  He's fucking gay!  Don't you get that?  And even if he wasn't, so what?

So what?

So what!  Why...what...you either think I'm fucking someone else or you don't.  Either way, it's your decision.  Make up your mind and act accordingly.

I'm not talking about who you're fucking, I'm talking about the necklace, the choker.

It's just a piece of jewelry!

Take it off then.

What?

Take it off.  It means nothing then take it off.

I don't want to.

Why?

Because I don't.  And I'm not taking it off because you say so.

I think you won't.

Think whatever you want.

I think you won't because someone gave it to you.  Someone special.  And your wearing it was some way to connect with him/her/it while you're going out with me.  And I think you're pissed because I figured it out.

OK fine, yes, I fucked Bill.  Normally he prefers guys but he said my vagina was so pretty that he just HAD to fuck it with his gay penis and I said OK because he promised to give me this beautiful and incredibly valuable necklace.

Nice.

Are you ready to go?

You're real nice you know that?

What do you mean I'm nice.

You're so smart.  Never wrong.  Always so sure of yourself...

Why is ANY of that bad?

...always so convinced that you know better.  You know how impossible that is?

Why don't you tell me.

I just wish, just once, I could feel like you needed me.

Right.

That I made a difference.  You know how they say...'I can't live without you.'  You could never say that.  You would rather die than need someone.  See?  You laugh.  What's funny about that?

I was just thinking how you're finally really getting me.  In this very moment.  You've finally figured me out.  You want this?  Here it's yours.  Take it.

Where are you going?  Wait.